Wednesday, October 6, 2010

I sat down to write the other day and...

So, before I truly start my post, I'd just like to do a little introduction concerning what you are about to read. First and foremost, it's a response to fellow blogger Rachel Harrie's first Crusader challenge. :) (If you're totally lost, check out this here post. It'll give you the rundown on the Crusade, who we Crusaders are, and why you should definitely jump on board!)

Now, for this challenge. We as Crusaders simply had to start a post with "I sat down to write the other day and..." and finish it. Below is my response.

And right here is my warning that this is quite possibly the most bizarre/random response to it out of all the entries. But then again, you never quite know... :)


I sat down to write the other day and...

...instead, got pelted in the head by a blunt object.

"What the...?"

I turned around and saw nothing, so, being the aspiring writer/cool blogger/elephant tamer that I am, I quickly returned to writing my latest blog post about me and my trip to Mars a few short weeks ago (you should totally go; who knew aliens were fans of roller coasters, Dippin' Dots ice cream, and quidditch?).

And that's when I was once more struck in the seemingly the exact same blunt object.

"Who threw that?" I sourly shrieked, whirling about in my chair to discover...nobody. Whoops. Forgot that everyone had left a good while ago for the day.

And that's when I saw it. A large, mechanical beast that resembled a liger. A colossal, steel liger, that is!

I shot up from my chair and backed toward the wall. I looked to the floor and saw that the liger had been throwing gloriously red apples at my head. Yum...

No, wait. I'm supposed to be scared. Supposed to be confused. Should I talk to it? Ask what it's doing here? Or, maybe more importantly, ask how the heck it got into my house?

"Miles," the liger stated, "I'm bored."

So? What in the world should I do?

"Liger, I'm writing a new post for my blog," I responded, looking at the floor, at my feet. At the apples. Anything but those insanely captivating, mechanically created eyes.

The liger frowned, then clunked out of the room. I watched it meander toward the kitchen, knock over the fridge, eat the fridge (ugh, I had some Taco Bell saved in there), then cantankerously shoot up and out of the chimney...after practically destroying the entire house in the process, of course.

I stood there, curious as to how I didn't notice its entrance (the gaping hole in the wall across from where I had been sitting may have been a good indication, I've now realized). And then, feeling that inevitable twang of guilt, I scooped up two apples and quickly made my way toward the (not really there anymore) chimney.

"Liger?" I called. "Liger?"

The mechanical liger descended back down the chimney, licking its steel lips. I threw it the apple and plopped down on the ground. Liger followed suit.

Chewing on the delicious, crisp apple, I decided to ask it, "So, have a blog?"

Liger looked at me, then shook its head. "Nope." It took a small nibble from the apple.

I didn't know where to take the conversation. And then, it hit me. "You know, Ruby, my dog, is extremely lonely nowadays, what with the whole house being gone constantly and all." I knew in my heart this wasn't true, but I felt so bad for the thing.

Liger eyed me, swallowing the final remnants of its apple.

"You know, you could...stay here. As another pet of mine," I then stated. Gulping. Scared. What was I doing?

Liger leaped upward and came crashing back down to the floor. I swear, the whole house lifted into the air! And that's why I now have a pet liger (Ruby's got some tough competition!)

Now just imagine this in mechanical form. :)


  1. LOL. Random? Yes. Excellent? Likewise.

    Did you get a new fridge? And some replacement Taco Bell?

  2. "you should totally go" - ha!! What's funny is we were actually talking about ligers at work this week (it's fun to be a preschool teacher!).
    (Also, a reminder about our blogfest today if you're still interested in participating)

  3. Hey Miles, what a cool entry! I can just picture a mechanical liger eating read apples :) I wonder how it gets along with Ruby though...

  4. Haha. Great beginning. So not expected ^.^ This is almost like a surreal dream! I have no idea how you could have come up with this.

  5. A pet liger?? Jeepers! I bet Ruby's jealous!

  6. Love that you included a liger! Great post!

  7. Crazy but very funny. (I think I said that to someone else and it was true then too.)

    Imagine if the liger had said yes to the blog question. What would it post about? Tips and tricks for other ligers on how to survive life in the big city? Requests for members to join a mechanical liger support group? Free giveaways of metal lubricant?


  8. LOL, very imaginative. I'll be thinking of ligers all day.

    I'm a new crudader and have followed your blog and am reading/voting. I hope you will pay me a visit at L'Aussie:

  9. I blurted out a "what the...?" too.

    I know your house is in shambles, but it's funny. Nice one, Miles.

    I have two dogs myself, Ella and M. You can read about their antics at:

  10. Miles - I gave you an award on my blog!

  11. Thanks so much for the comments, everyone!

    Su, I did manage to get a new fridge, but sadly, I haven't found any time to get some replacement Taco Bell. :) I'll get through the next few weeks, though!

    Adina, I think that's a fantastic future blog post I'll have to look into doing. (I think a support group would really make Liger happy; it doesn't like Ruby much and snuggles up with me day in and day out!)

    Carole Ann Carr, L'Aussie, and Grandpa, thanks for following my blog! It's great to meet you guys! I'm heading over to your blogs right now! :)